


temporary nothing

by Swiickol



Series: quiet motions [1]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Amnesia, Animal Death, Gen, Ghost Wilbur Soot, Ghostbur is pissed, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Mild Blood, Wilbur Soot-centric, but there’s not much comfort, friend is dead y’all, no beta we die like Tubbo at the festival, not me adding tags, spoilers for jan 5/6 streams, tagging is hard, you see he has memory problems
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-12 03:20:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28878612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Swiickol/pseuds/Swiickol
Summary: It was a foreign feeling.Grief.He never felt so much of it before. Yet, he felt like he had so much at the same time.Grief was so familiar, like an old friend from primary school that you cross paths with in secondary school.But, he was Ghostbur.Ghostbur was happy all the time!.....If that was true, why did it feel so strong?_Ghostbur was used to feeling nothing but happiness, choosing to opt out and ignore any negative emotions. He'd much rather stay positive.But when he returns from his little trek in the artic, he finds the body of his friend, Friend, and promptly feels an amount of feelings he hadn't experienced since Alivebur was...well, alive.(Or, I was kinda sad at 3 am and decide to vent with some Ghostbur angst. Based on that one scene. Family dynamics IS canon in this cause yea- "comfort".)
Relationships: Wilbur Soot & Phil Watson
Series: quiet motions [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2152053
Comments: 4
Kudos: 50





	temporary nothing

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not particularly that good at writing but anything for Ghostbur Ig
> 
> also: canon!phil is low-key a bad dad imo

It was a foreign feeling. 

Grief. 

He never felt so much of it before. Yet, he felt like he had so much at the same time. 

Grief was so familiar, like an old friend from primary school that you cross paths with in secondary school. 

But, he was Ghostbur. 

Ghostbur was happy all the time!

.....If that was true, why did it feel so strong?  
__________

Ghostbur clutched his fists, translucent tears leaking down his face, slightly burning his face and causing it to sizzle. But he couldn't bring himself to care. He just couldn't. 

Not as his best friend layed here, lifeless and cold, blue wool covered in blood. There was so much blood. Why was there so much blood? Ghostbur cupped a hand around Friend's face, gently lifting it up. His normally blank eyes were in an expression of shock, something that deeply upset the ghost. It wasn't right. He didn't deserve this. Friend was a harmless sheep. Why didn't Phil protect him? He said he wouldn't let anything hurt his friend. Did Phil...did Phil lie?

Why'd Phil lie?

Friend was Ghostbur's friend. Ghostbur and Friend hadn't bothered anyone. They were just Ghostbur and Friend!

He felt bile rise in his throat, the emotions overwhelming. Floating closer to the ground, Ghostbur twitched repeatedly. The emotion was one he hadn't felt in..ever. It was very new. Why was he feeling it? Ghostbur only feels happy! Happy is the only good emotion. He couldn't feel like this because some sheep died.

Were his feelings justified though? Friend was his everything, the only genuine happiness he had in the afterlife. Could he be angry?

Ghostbur floated in thought, his emotions flipping between emptiness, happiness, and the cold bitterness. It wasn't particularly pleasant. He wishes it would stop. It was too much. 

Maybe talking to Phil would be good. Maybe he has the answer. Everyone knows more than him, Phil would definitely know. He'll just lie again, won't he? Phil is bad. He killed Friend.

Somewhere deep inside him, this felt like a bad idea. Deep inside of him, something was yelling at him. Something knew something would happen. 

Like many things, Ghostbur elects to ignore it. 

He wonders if things would've turned out differently if he didn't go to Phil. 

__________

When Ghostbur found Phil over the ruins of (New) L'Manberg, he suddenly felt his metaphorical heart drop. 

His father was covered in blood, blue robes ripped and dirty. 

"P-Phil?" He spoke, quiet and echoey voice barely alerting his father. 

He regrets ever speaking because Phil turns around with a deathly glare, looking about ready to cut whoever disturbed his destruction's head off. Luckily, his expression immediately softened once he recognised the ghost of his dead son. 

Unluckily for Ghostbur, he was trembling in his sweater. He'd never been so scared of Phil like that.

Phil's tattered wings wrapped around Ghostbur, pulling him closer. He froze for a second before accepting the embrace, resting his head against his father's chest. 

It was peaceful for a brief moment, he could've stayed like this for a few hours in all honesty. (You didn't get many hugs as a ghost. Everyone said they were "too busy" if Ghostbur ever tried getting a slight amount of comfort from them.) 

The quiet was quickly broken when Phil spoke, though. "So, what brings you here Wil?" A slight rumble went through Phil's chest as he let out a small chuckle. 

The use of his alive counterpart's name made him wince, but he answered nonetheless. "Y-you..You..Friend was in your house, correct?"

Ghostbur felt Phil's laughter stop, as if he suddenly came to a realisation. Ghostbur felt himself be pushed out of the hug, giving the ghost a chance to view the expression on his father's face. It was blank. 

Just bright, green eyes staring down (up) at him. 

Ghostbur clenched his hair for a brief second, a memory of another green eyed man quickly appearing and disappearing just as fast. 

Phil's face softened for a second, looking away with slight- guilt? anger? regret? He didn't know. 

Ghostbur let out a deep exhale, composing himself again. 

With that, Phil took the opportunity to speak again. "Yes, I suppose he was. Why?" Phil knew why Ghostbur was asking. He knows what happened he knows Friend is fucking dead he shouldn't ask why-

"Well, uh, I couldn't find Friend? Your house is just..ruined like the rest of L'Manberg. Friend isn't there.." Ghostbur said softly, his head tilting slightly. An act of innocence. 

A quiet "hmm" rose from Phil. He watched as Phil turned away from Ghostbur for a brief second, surveying L'Manberg's damage. He turned back to Ghostbur and looked at him for a few seconds before talking once more. "He's gone, Wil. There's no way Friend could've survived the withers and TNT." 

He said it like it was just a normal thing to throw around. He was so nonchalant about it that it infuriated Ghostbur. Friend's memory deserved so much better than that. 

He couldn't keep the bitterness from rising from his throat. "So you knew he was in there. And you didn't bother to save him." Ghostbur clenched his fists.

Phil's eyes turned dark. "A message had to be sent."

"What message? What message was so important that Friend had to die for you to send?" He spat, practically vibrating with pure rage by now. Ghostbur backed away from Phil. He couldn't stand close to him in good conscience. 

"The government, Wil! I've seen too many people get lost in power, straying away from their roots. While their actions may be well-intentioned..Power corrupts. Too much power, in the hands of one person. They change. And not for the better." Phil stated simply, as if that were a reasonable explanation for killing Ghostbur's Friend. His only Friend. 

"But I- I haven't. I haven't done anything. I-I'm just Ghostbur." He hated how his voice sounded so utterly broken and cracked. It made him sound sad. Ghostbur isn't supposed to be sad. 

"It had to be done. L'Manberg needed to know government isn't the way." That was the thing. They didn't have to do it like this. They didn't have to destroy people's homes. They didn't have to kill people's loved ones. 

All this war and blood and death made Ghostbur feel something he couldn't begin to describe. He wants it to stop. He just wants everyone to be happy and have some blue. He wants the SMP to have a semblance of peace. Even for just a fucking minute. 

People like Phil and Alivebur are the reason no one is happy. They just hurt everyone that used to care. 

Ghostbur's face darkens as his expression becomes more intense, the pale grey that was his skin taking on a dark blue-ish tint. "You knew. You knew that Friend was in that house. YOU STILL BLEW UP LMANBERG KNOWING FRIEND WAS IN THAT HOUSE." He felt his throat become raw when he shouted, the strain evident in his voice. 

"W-" Ghostbur cut him off. Phil didn't deserve to speak. Not right now. Maybe he never did.

"STOP. STOP. Don't talk." Ghostbur coughed, a blue goo leaking from his mouth. "I'm tired. I'm tired of suffering whilst you carry on your petty conflicts. All this war. This bloodshed. Why do I- why do I have to suffer for your actions? I'm just Ghostbur. Ghostbur. All I want is to have happiness and peace and love with Friend. But apparently that's not allowed. Apparently, happiness isn't allowed on this server. Everyone casts me aside with a fake smile and a pat on the shoulder. To them I'm just the amnesiac ghost who isn't nearly as inspiring as Alivebur. You all tell me that Alivebur was bad but then go around proclaiming how much better he was. It's stupid and I don't understand. I don't understand how that works. Do my...do my feelings not matter? I'm my own person- ghost. I'm different, Phil." Ghostbur laughed to himself, sounding a bit too happy for it to be sane. He gripped his translucent hair, pulling it into his face. 

Phil couldn't even say anything. Just stood there. Staring blankly. Of course. No one can ever say anything. 

Especially not Phil. 

No one truly understands Ghostbur. Except Friend. And he's gone.

________

Ghostbur leaves shortly after that, not wanting to deal with the man he once looked up to as a father. 

He was disappointed(?) He didn't know.

He still felt hurt and angry, of course, but less than before. Like a weight had been lifted off of his chest- It filled him with a sense of relief. For once, he was happy to not rely on the blue to release his emotions. Perhaps he could actually...talk? About his feelings? Instead of letting all of them flow into this clear dye. Who'd listen though? Would he just have to mumble it all to Fri- a rock or some other inanimate object?

Ghostbur didn't know.  
_________

As the hours pass, he..he misses Friend even more. Friend was a comforting presence.

He misses Friend a lot. He wishes Friend were here, but he can feel something tearing itself from him. Something is being erased by his stupid mind that can't keep a damn memory in it. It's so hard to remember Friend's passing. It's so..so..fuzzy. This..this was a memory he wanted to keep. 

He didn't want to forget Friend's death and the feelings it brought him. He needed it. He needed something sentimental to hold on, something that would elicit an emotion from him. 

Ghostbur punched his forehead- As if that would help bring a memory of all things back- but he had to try. 

He had to. This was for his Friend. 

For Friend. 

For Friend. 

For..Friend...

The last thing he sees is a translucent sheep before everything goes black.  
_________

The ghost wakes up a few hours later, confused as he looks around the rubble that used to be L'Manberg. He decides to pay it no mind, spotting Tommy, Quackity, and Tubbo. 

He could worry about that later! As long as L'Manberg's people were safe, everything was fine!

For now, he'd talk to his friends and hope Friend was still sitting in Phil's house.

**Author's Note:**

> Considering turning this into a series of just Alivebur/Ghostbur or SBI centric fics heehoo. 
> 
> Yes, the chapter name is a mxmtoon song I’m sorry  
> comments are very much appreciated :)


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